Good News

 Friday 26th October, 2012

Yesterday I had to go back to the hospital. This was to see my consultant Mr Cunnick to talk through my surgery results and discuss the next stage of my treatment.

I arrived at the hospital in a bit of a state as I had spent the last few days worrying. Worrying that I might need more surgery or that the cancer was more advanced than they thought it might be. Just being back in hospital makes it all real again as well. Christ I'm 37 and I have cancer. I still can't believe it. It's so surreal and I just want out of this bubble. Walking from the car to the outpatients department was an ordeal in itself. My legs had turned to jelly, I was shaking and my mouth was bone dry. I was holding onto hubbys  arm for dear life and we had to stop three times as my head kept spinning and I was sure I was going to faint.

We arrived at reception and we were told to put my letter outside room 6 and take a seat. It was 45 minutes before I was called in to see Mr Cunnick and it was 45 minutes of feeling lightheaded and sweating and just wanting to run away and get back to the safety of my home.

Once called in by Hilary, my breast cancer nurse, we took a seat and Mr Cunnick asked how I was feeling. I explained that physically I felt good but emotionally I was a bit of a mess. That we were both a bit of a mess, as hubby  had been struggling too. We were once again reassured that this is perfectly normal to feel this way. Cancer is a massive shock to the system. It turns your world upside down.

Mr Cunnick then turned to my notes and began telling me what I was here for. This is what I was told...

1. No cancer was detected in my lymph nodes meaning the cancer hadn't  spread.

2. The tumour was 1cm smaller than they originally thought at only 2.5cm.

3. The surrounding breast tissue had a clear margin of cancer cells by  7mm. They like it to be at least 3mm. This means no more surgery for me as they have all the cancer and surrounding cells.

4. The tumour had been tested twice for hormone receptors. Twice it came back negative. This is classed as a triple negative tumour. This is an aggressive tumour that is only found in around 15% of breast cancer patients. It means that drugs like tamoxifen wont be of any use to me so chemo and radiotherapy are my only hope. Also most women with this type of tumour usually carry the faulty BRCA1 gene.

5. I will need chemo but I can wait until after Christmas before I start it. It won't be tablet form as first thought. It will be through a drip. BOO!

6. Chemo will be 6 treatments at 3 weekly intervals.

7. When chemo is done I will need radiotherapy everyday for 4 weeks.

8. I will need yearly mammograms until I'm 50 and then I will just go to NHS standard screening all being well.

9. I will be genetically tested as there is family history and also my tumour being triple negative means I have a higher risk of carrying the faulty BRCA1 gene.

10. I'm healing well

 

So although I'm not out of the woods yet and cancer still has plenty of chances to start kicking my arse right back with the chemo I'M PRETTY DAMN HAPPY WITH THAT.

 

I left the hospital as if there was nothing wrong with me. No dizziness, no wobbly legs, no shaking! CURSE YOU ANXIETY!!

 

So here's to the rest of the year. MERRY CHRISTMAS....mine will be. ;)