FECKING FEC!

So I'm home after 8 days in isolation at Stoke Mandeville hospital. The lovely chemo combination that is known as FEC seems to be doing its job. It's killing cells. Sadly it killed ALL my white blood cells leaving me with no immune system and then I goes and gets an infection. The official medical term is neutropenic sepsis.
Two antibiotics were pumped through my body. The first antibiotic was a drug called Meropenem. This was given to me three times a day. The other antibiotic was a drug called Gentamicin, which was given via a drip every 24 hours. I have not googled either of these drugs as there may be a chance that I may need them again over the next four months. I know that Gentamicin is particularly strong though as I had to have daily blood tests to make sure that my kidneys were functioning properly. It can also make you deaf.
My white blood cells are slowly coming back and on Tuesday I have chemo number 2 and we start all over again.
The other thing to happen whilst in hospital was my hair began falling out. I tried waiting until I got home but it was becoming too distressing to see it falling out everywhere so it was time to get the graders out.
Two days prior to my hair falling out my head went very numb. A very odd sensation but I'm guessing that was all the hair cells dying off.
I had a good cry, which I was quite surprised by as I really didn't think that losing my hair would bother me so much. It's the psychological matter of suddenly looking like a cancer patient. It's obvious to everybody now but once it was gone and I had a good look in the mirror it was clear I was still me. It didn't make me look or feel sicker. Just balder.
It's weird to be home and I felt very shaky. I think that's just not having the safety net of nurses on call and isolation. I am beginning to settle though and my god am I looking forward to a decent meal. I love the NHS but the food is truly disgusting. In fact it's an utter disgrace.
Chemo brain is kicking in also, which is most bizarre. The nurse asked me my date of birth and I had to think for a good minute and I'm forgetting what I am talking about mid sentence.
Right now I'm pretty whacked out but as my cells keep multiplying then my strength will come back too.
My next chemo dose is going to be reduced so hopefully my body will cope better next time. Fingers crossed. At least I have 4 medicine free days until then.
1 down, 5 to go *faints*